Madonna’s “Hard Candy” Receives Terrible Reviews

May 14, 2008

Madonna’s infringing CD “Hard Candy” has been the recipient of terrible reviews. The album really is quite poor and has seen the phony pop star butchering other people’s copyrighted works.

Many critics are now accusing her of ripping off others music and following trends well after they happened, when she falsely claims to be an innovator. No, she is the imitator and always has been.

In going over some of the songs on her “Hard Candy” CD I also heard other people’s lyrics on her album, not just mine. For example:

In one song she rips off R. Kelly stealing his lyric “Silence can seem so loud” from his big hit “I Believe I Can Fly.”

In another song she ripped off Ciara’s 2007’s smash “Promise” for her 2008 “Spanish Lesson” that appears on Hard Candy by lifting the following lyrics:

Ciara 2007: You can be my teacher I’ll do homework. You can give me extra credit baby I’ll do more work.

Madonna 2008: If you do your homework. Maybe I will give you more work.

Then there’s the 50 Cent rip off where she steals his song “Candy Shop” calling her own version “Candy Shop as well, whilst ripping off his lyrics.

She continually steals other people’s music, regurgitates substandard versions of it, claiming it as her own. She really knows how to mess up a song.

This type of conduct is unacceptable. Artists are supposed to bring something new to the table. Not rip off preexisting pieces of music and imagery, repackaging them as your own.

That’s the ultimate fraud. You don’t get worse as an artist than that. It tells the world you are a fake and not the real deal. No one respects that.

It’s funny, one reviewer points out she “ripped off” her own music via the infringing song “She’s Not Me” from “Hard Candy” that knocks off her previous infringing song “Sorry” from Confessions On A Dance Floor.

However, these are both tracks I had formally accused Madonna of infringing from my Copyrighted Catalog. That’s my writing style and the songs had been in the Copyright Office registered to me, years before she criminally stole them in violation of U.S. and U.N. law.

Tainted ‘Candy’

When trendsetting turns into trend-chasing, it’s time to hang it up.

Most surprising, some of Candy’s catchier moments are barely disguised thefts from other, better songs. She’s Not Me shamelessly apes Sorry from her own Dancefloor; Spanish Lesson steals so baldly from Timberlake’s Senorita and Like I Love You that it’s a wonder Madonna didn’t just sample those songs instead.

But perhaps Confessions was her swan song, a last best guess that left her sifting through sounds, searching in vain for that next groundbreaking, guaranteed hit.

Madonna’s ‘Hard Candy’ definitely not better with age

Madonna is known as one of those artists who jumps on the latest trends in music, only to leave it lying in the dust when she goes back into the studio to work on her next album. On “Hard Candy” the only thing that is offered up is lots of dancing, relationships and sex.

CD Review: Madonna “Hard Candy”

But with “Hard Candy,” Madonna plays catch-up with mainstream pop charts. She essentially has remade Nelly Furtado’s “Loose” and half of Justin Timberlake’s “FutureSex/LoveSounds,” following fashion trends that are 2 years old. Is this where Madonna wants to be?

Never mind the off-putting come-ons such as “My sugar is raw, sticky and sweet” from the opener, “Candy Shop,” or the nausea-inducing cover art redolent of down-market porn: Those are the least of Madonna’s problems. She banks everything on the catchy but vacant single, “4 Minutes,” in which Timbaland recycles the marching band trope that drove Gwen Stefani’s “Hollaback Girl.” With Timbaland and Timberlake in the foreground, Madge certainly doesn’t own the song; she is a bit player on her own track.

On “Hard Candy,” when she slags Madonnalikes such as Britney Spears and Furtado (“She’s Not Me”), the argument falls flat because these days, Madonna’s trying to be them.

CD reviews: Madonna’s ‘Hard Candy’ is more bland than sweet

Simply, one cannot imagine a major artist — and no matter how one feels about Madame Ciccone, she’s a star of the highest magnitude — releasing such tepid material.

“Hard Candy” feels and sounds like a desperate attempt to remain relevant, with Madonna enlisting the likes of Justin Timberlake, Timbaland, Pharrell Williams and Kanye West for support.

That’s sort of like enlisting Picasso and Van Gogh to paint a house.

What’s most apparent is that Madonna, at 49, has become what she must fear most: Irrelevant, boring and disposable.
— Regis Behe

Madonna’s hard sell for new album

Hard Candy is expected to make No.1 in the US and Australia in its first week and has been reviewed favourably in a number of overseas publications, but already there has been considerable negative press in her own country, most of it suggesting that the raunch, not to mention the music, is beginning to look a little tired.

It’s baffling that Madonna, of all people, couldn’t bring the best out of Timbaland and Pharrell, and the fact that she couldn’t highlights the degree to which she was in over her head. It’s sadder than the balding guy who buys a sports car; it’s like a balding guy who goes to buy a sports car and drives off with a lemon because he doesn’t know anything about cars. Unless Madonna can figure out how to recalibrate her identity in a way that compliments her, she could be facing an early retirement.

More sour than sweet

Madonna sounds out of touch on Hard Candy, her 11th album

It’s no secret Madonna is unhappy with the way time is ticking ever onward. But the cover of her new CD, Hard Candy, tells the story in a way that words cannot. There’s Madge, almost 50, in faux-bondage gear, trying to make like it’s 1992.

Make her think she’s invulnerable to the aging process, that she can keep up with the kids? She certainly tries, here. But that’s the problem — you can hear her trying…

For Madonna to get on the bandwagon at this late stage feels like a calculated (and belated) attempt to get some street cred…

The problem is Madonna. She sounds out of touch, like she’s not sure what to do with herself. Her trademark frigid coo doesn’t fit with these bump ‘n’ grind rhythms, and her usually harmless pop hooks repeatedly fall flat.

Hard Candy quickly loses its flavor

Madonna seems to have made the unfortunate mistake of letting other pop stars serve as her bellwether — instead of Britney looking to Madge for inspiration, Madge seems to have taken a page out of Britney’s latest book, taking half-a**ed sleaze over the seductive sounds that made her an icon in the ‘80s.

Still, you have to give her and her pop juggernaut friends credit — recycling pop music trends has to help curb the effects of global warming, right?


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